Your wedding day is a special day for you and your fiancé, a day when you share your love and commitment with the people close to you. We, at Andrei Weddings, believe that the wedding day must be a day to be enjoyed also by the guests attending the wedding. They have to be thanked for their support and the happy couple have to ensure they do everything in their power so that they have a fabulous time. In this blog post we’re going to reveal the most common complaints we heard from the guests and how to deal with them accordingly.
1. An inconvenient date
You really have to think it over before asking your guests to cancel their Christmas plans or watching or attending some other important event (like a major sports tournament final). Hosting during a holiday may interfere with traditions your guests wouldn’t want to miss, and in a case of a sporting event, you may encounter the following scenario : they will be MIA during important moments of your wedding reception, because they’re sneaking off to find out a score, or even worse watch it on a nearby TV.
How to deal: If you consider having your wedding at a time coinciding holidays or other events, check in with your closest loved ones to see if they have plans, or they would be open to attending. There are cases, when there’s no way around this issue, so you’d just have to shrug off the complainers. Keep in mind that if the guests know about the date for months in advance they will be more inclined to consider attending, so the sooner you send out that save-the-date, the better.
2. Invitation confusion
You can easily get frustrated when a guest thinks they’re receiving a plus-one you had no intention of inviting. Even if you address the wedding invitations using proper etiquette, this can still happen.
How to deal: Don’t dodge the question-it will only make things more awkward. We’d recommend addressing the miscommunication kindly. You can avoid confusion, just by writing the names of the guests you want to invite on the response card and having them check off a “will attend” or “will not attend” box.
3. Seating snafus
You’d think the most difficult part of planning your wedding would be to compile and finalise your guest list. Think again, because the challenge of seating arrangements is also complicated, as it involves part art, part science, as you want everyone have a good time, and who knows, maybe a few friendships will be made.
How to deal: If your guests' elbows touch and they can't easily move in between tables, you've probably crammed too many of them in one spot. If you're having a hard time divvying a group of friends or family members equally, try to seat guests within the same vicinity so that they can lean over and "awww" together during the first dance instead of texting across the room.
Table numbers with fun facts about the couple serve as a great conversation-starter.
4. Pulling out the wallet
The guests dislike cash bars and many wedding planners recommend against them.
How to deal: All the professionals are in agreement that cash bars are a major no-no. In case you’re still in doubt, just think about the following scenario: you have guests in your home. You’d never ask them to pay for a drink, so why should the wedding be any different. That doesn’t mean you should fork over the cash for an open bar if you can’t afford it. It is highly recommended to have a limited selection of beverages to please everyone.
5. Climate crisis
Every frequent wedding-goer has participated in an event that was either sweltering or freezing cold. Exposing the guests to extreme weather conditions will severely cramp their style and will leave them with an unpleasant memory of your special day.
How to deal: There’s nothing you can do if a weather emergency happens on your wedding day. However, there are some small measures you can take to ensure that guests are comfortable. For example you can have double-duty fans that serve as programs for summer weddings and you can gift your bridesmaids a shawl or faux fur wrap for winter weddings.
Faux fur shrugs add a seasonal element to your wedding photos and keep guests warm (see how happy they look?).
6. Inedible food (or lack thereof)
A bad experience you’d want to avoid at a wedding is terrible food. If that occurs, your guests may end up ordering food through some catering app, and that would be embarrassing for both parts involved, the wedding couple and the guests.
How to deal: Arrange for a food tasting before you set up your menu. Not even spectacular décor can compensate for rubbery chicken or blink-and-you'll-miss-it shrimp. It is crucial to ask about food allergies of dietary requirements ahead of time. t's also important to make sure they don't run out of food at the cocktail hour. If you're only having dessert or some light nibbles, that's fine, but please mention it to your guests (especially if you're having the party during mealtime).
7. Never-ending toasts or photo montages
What you don’t want to happen at your wedding is the following: you don’t want to have the Best Man speech really long, because people will get bored and en dup booing. Add a couple of champagne glasses to the mix and you’ve got a recipe for disaster.
How to deal: Let the toastees know in advance that you don’t want them to stress over writing a novel of a speech, so the cheat sheet version will do the trick. You can even have your DJ signal a musical cue if it’s time to wrap things up, just like it happens at the Oscars.
8. DJ, please stop the music
I’ve heard complaints that the music wasn’t as varied as to fit everyone’s taste. Or that the music was too loud, and people were looking for places like the bathroom to rest their pounding head, only to find a group other guests camped out there for the same reason.
How to deal: During your cocktail hour and dinner, play music that's low enough so that guests can hear each other without having to scream. Increase the volume when the time is right, and make sure no elderly guests are seated right next to the speakers. Conversely, nothing is more awkward than being at a wedding where no one wants to get up and dance. If a song or genre just isn't working, ask your band or DJ to switch gears.
9. Disorganization to the max
You don’t want to extend lets say the cocktail hour and turn it into a two-and-a-half hours long moment, just because the bride and groom wanted more photos in the moonlight. By doing this, the time the dinner will be served will be moved forward and that will make people angry.
How to deal: If you're unable to hold the ceremony and reception within two hours of each other, make other accommodations for your guests. For example, the site can have a waiting area where drinks and light refreshments will be served for early birds. If your reception/ceremony space is sprawled out, consider using sign posts to direct guests to necessary landmarks, like the dance floor and bathroom.
"Just how long are you going to make us wait?"
10. Ungracious hosts
"We only saw the bride when she walked down the aisle!" or "It's been a year and I still haven't received a thank-you card!"
How to deal: As a bride you can go from table to table to thank everyone for coming. It doesn’t have to take long- even just a quick „hi and bye” will please your guests and will be appreciated.
No matter how tempting it is to scrap the thank-you cards guests will notice if you don't send one. This has to be a team effort so we’d recommend to split the duties with your husband and break it up into manageable chunks so that it doesn't seem so overwhelming anymore.